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Ready to be done… sorta

April 29, 2006

I am so ready to be done with this year. A few parts were good, but the majority of the year kind of sucked. I am excited about my room for next year and the fabulous parking that I’ll have, but I almost wish that I had chosen to live off-campus in an apartment all by my lonesome. At least next year I will have a separate room to go to if I want to be alone. As excited as I am about next year, it hit me a couple of days ago that I am going to be a senior next year. This time next year I will be packing up all my stuff to leave Rice… for good. Emery and I were talking about how you don’t really realize how many graduating seniors there are until you come back in the fall and they aren’t there anymore. Then I said something about how next year it would be me leaving: I started freaking out. How is it I talk about grad school all the time, but it didn’t hit me that I was leaving? At times I am ready to say goodbye to Rice and never look back, but then I think about the people that I’ve become good friends with and I want to stay for the extra year. I’ve never questioned my decision to transfer (That doesn’t mean that I didn’t question the decision to come to Rice). I am much happier here than I ever was, or could be, in Abilene. The biggest problem of transferring is the fact that I matriculated with and became with people who are graduating the year after I am. That means that they are going abroad next year and I won’t get to spend as much time with them. There are so many people that I am going to miss, but I guess that’s the choice I’ve made for myself. For the forseeable future there will be just as many goodbyes as there are hellos. When I leave Rice I will work on my Masters somewhere. After that I may stay and do my PhD or go elsewhere to get it. Then I will have to go somewhere to get an actual job. Arghh!! Why do I react so poorly to change?

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